Phone sex

Sometimes when I am still up late at night, I sit behind the computer, but I have the tv on, sometimes just as some background noise, sometimes because there is actually something worth watching. Mostly it's just garbage being thrown in our living room, though. And especially the commercials late at night. It already starts around 11 p.m. Very carefully, and almost unnoticable the first commercials start to appear. And the closer you get to midnight, the more they become. And the more annoying they become. I am of course talking about those commercials for telephone sex.

The ladies are all moaning as if they are paid per decibel, and the one even more fake than the other. One is even dressed in one of those sexy police outfit and "coming" like a police siren. Can it be more pathetic? Some of the lines they use are just so...so....I can't even find a word for it, not even in Dutch. "You wanna do me from behind? Then I will turn myself around" "Wanna visit the girl of your dreams? Call me, I am wet and ready for you to come in" OH, PLEASE !! I need to vomit!!
Also our favorite trans-sexual Kelly comes along every once in a while. "What do you mean dirty? I am a very sweet girl". And then you hear someone yell "OH KELLY !!!" I think I need a bucket the next time this commercial is on, because I won't be able to keep my dinner in.
(For those of you not from Holland, Kelly has become famous, when she revealed in Big Brother, that she is a transgender, after kissing one of the other contestants. I think if that would happen to me, I would just kill myself.)

I never had the need to call those lines when I was kid. Well, even if I did, it's hard to call, when your parents pay the phone bill, and received a specified invoice every 2 months.
I think in all honesty, maybe I have called 1 or 2 times one of those numbers, when I was alone. And I think when I was with friends, you also make a call like that, to be tough, to show off.

When I was kid, it just started to become big business, and it was still a bit shady. Nowadays, it's a multimillion euro business, and probably a nice way for house-wifes to make an extra buck.
So, you can call one number and get a sexy asian girl from Thailand, who can do things to you, which you didn't even know that was possible, and call another number and you get a beautiful blonde, with legs that go on forever, and a megacup DD or whatever.
While in fact you probably get the same ugly lady, with legs you can find at the butcher's for 3,99 a pound, and breasts you need binoculars to even find them.

I am wondering, what kind of people would call those numbers? Is it only those pimple-faced schoolboys they make money from, or is that only a small percentage, and is there a certain type of guy who needs those numbers to get off? What is so attracting to hear someone say what they are going to do to you, while you know that they are probably knitting a sweater or reading a magazine while talking to you?

I never understood this whole concept of phone-sex and probably never will. Am I missing something? Well......probably not.

Telesales

The other day I was surfing the net for just anything and nothing, when I came across an ad for the greencard lottery from the US government. Since I always liked a gamble every now and then, and I know this lottery is free, or at least I think it is, I decided to register myself. So, I filled in the form, and pressed continue. And there it was, page 2, with all the prices for a one time deal up to a 4 year subscription. Since I don't wanna pay for something that is free, I closed the page, and forgot about it.
One hour later I got a call from that same company, who had seen that i filled in my details. And they were like sharks. No matter what I did to loosing them, including hanging up, they just wouldn't let go. Just when I was about to get nasty myself too, they apparently realized that I wasn't biting, and a not really friendly manner was the conversation ended.
Annoyingly enough the same thing has happened to me before with a well-known dutch company. And this was probably an even worse violation of my privacy then here above mentioned.
I was checking the Wanadoo homepage, since we were thinking about changing provider. I had to fill in one of those zip-code locator and my housenumber, to see if they have service in this area. Next day I got a call from Wanadoo. They called bcos they saw that I have been checking their site and had a special offer for me. Them calling me, meant that they had found my telephone number through the locator I HAD to fill in, in order for me to continue to the next page. I found that the worst case of privacy violation I have ever seen.
Anyway, I don't know how it is in other parts of the world, but in Holland the business of telemarketing is booming, and at the same time driving everyone nuts.
Talking of telemarketing, I found this site the other day, this is so funny: http://howtoprankatelemarketer.ytmnd.com/